Montessori School of Greater Lafayette Blog

   
Grace's first day of Montessori preschool, 1997.

      Last summer, my 19-year-old daughter was getting ready to move into her first apartment. I was excited for her to have the chance to live on her own and had been setting aside household items that I thought she could use. One day, after admiring the “steal” of a chair I had found at Goodwill, she asked me, “Aren’t you sad that I won’t live here anymore?”

     “Well, honey,” I said, “I always imagined that you would grow up and move out of the house. That was our goal all along for you to be an independent, self-sufficient person.”

     “I know,” she said. “But I’m kind of sad that I won’t be sleeping here anymore.”

     I reminded her that she had hardly slept at home at all since she started college last year. She lived in the dorm, four hours away from home and we often didn’t hear from her for days.

     “Yeah, but this is different. I just can’t believe this won’t be my home address anymore. Are you going to change the garage door code?”

     A-ha! Then I figured it out. She was worried about cutting the cord from the house where she grew up. I had been concerning myself with making sure she was comfortable “out there” and she was worried she would no longer be welcome back at home.

     It occurred to me that not much has changed between that day and the day sixteen years ago when we were preparing to send her to preschool here at the Montessori School of Greater Lafayette. Back then we were so excited to help our “baby” pick out a new lunch box and indoor shoes but we had little idea what to do to help prepare her (or ourselves) emotionally for this new chapter. She sailed through preschool and is now working through nursing school just fine, but we have learned a lot since then. Today I am sharing some tips and advice gathered from teachers and parents here at MSGL to help you and your child prepare for the first days of preschool.

Talk about school - mindfully.
     Talk with your child about preschool when he is in the mood. Maybe he will bring it up or you can start the conversation, just don’t push too hard. If your child seems “done” with the conversation or is becoming anxious, let the topic drop until later. And be honest about your feelings when you do talk about school. Some children worry that their parents will be sad or lonely when they are gone. When you say, “I am going to miss being with you in the morning, but it makes me happy to know you will be enjoying yourself at school,” it lets him know that you will miss him but you are confident that school is a good place for him to be.

Check out the new environment.
     MSGL’s Parent Work Day is Saturday, August 16th. This is a great time to get familiar with the school and classroom environments and to be part of the school community. Children are encouraged to help clean lockers, pull weeds, and load and unload wheelbarrows full of mulch right alongside their parents and new classmates. And, each family member's time counts towards your volunteer hours requirement.

     You will have another opportunity to get familiar with the school when your child attends her New Student Orientation visit on Monday, August 18th. This is her first opportunity to see her teachers and classmates in her new classroom. She can put her indoor shoes in her locker, locate her cubby and extra clothes box, and see where the bathroom is. The whole family can attend the Parent Orientation later that evening and maybe your child can give a tour of her new classroom.

Make new friends.
     You will receive a class list via email in August. Consider contacting a few families on the list to set up a playdate before school starts. Even if you can’t get together with any other families, you and your child can look over the names on the list together. You may discover that one of his classmates lives on your street or maybe someone has the same name as a sibling or a friend.

Help her dress for success.
     Our Montessori classrooms are prepared to encourage your child’s independence and you can help by providing your child with shoes and clothing that she can put on and take off by herself. Belts, suspenders, and jumpsuits look smart but they can be difficult for your child to use successfully. Provide your child a choice of clothing that allows her complete independence in her self-care routines. And please remember that preschool is a time to jump in and explore. Paint, snack, sand, and dirt from the garden can stain your child’s clothing, so please send her to school in clothes that can stand to get dirty. 

Plan a morning routine.
     Now is a good time to do a mental run-through of your morning routine. Consider how much time your child needs to wake up, get dressed, and eat breakfast. Allow time for packing lunches, finding coats and shoes, and getting on the bike or in the car. Then add a few extra minutes. Parents and children who are not in a rush tend to have much better experiences at drop-off. Some families even do a few “practice runs” in the summer to see if they can get to school and work on time.

Create a goodbye routine.
     Discuss with your child how you each want to say goodbye at drop-off. Some families say, “After you put on your inside shoes and put away your lunch box, we will walk to the classroom and I will give you three hugs and two kisses before I go to work.” Some children like to wave to dad out the window and some parents leave their children with specific plans for what they will do after school. “Sonia is picking you up today” or “we are going to the Farmer’s Market on our bikes after school today.” Children have so little control over their daily lives that they appreciate at least knowing what is happening and when.

     And while we’re talking about goodbyes, let’s take just a moment to consider the specter of separation anxiety.

What if my child cries when I walk away?
     Separating from your child that first time can be heart-breaking, but remember - it’s only for a few moments. The majority of children who are sad when they separate from their parents are able to calm themselves and choose an activity within a few minutes. If you have gone through the goodbye routine and are finding it hard to turn around and walk away, ask your teacher for help. Sometimes parents say, “Please help me. I need to leave.” That is the teacher’s sign that she needs to hold your child’s hand or pick her up so that you can walk away. Teachers don’t want to step in before you are ready to go but they are happy to help when you ask them.

     The best thing you can do for your child at drop-off is to be consistent and walk away when you say you will. Lingering tends to just prolong the heartache for the parent and the child. The first few times you drop your child off may be difficult, but trust that with consistent repetition you and your child will develop a peaceful good-bye routine.

Talk with the teachers. 
     Talk with your child’s teachers about how the adjustment period is going. The teachers help dozens of children adjust to school every year but this may be your first time. They expect you will have questions and concerns. Email is a great way to communicate with your child’s teachers and all of the contact information is available on the classroom web page at Msgl.org.

Help your child talk about his day.
     If this is the first time your child has been away from home you will no doubt be very eager to know what he did all day. Unfortunately, preschoolers often say they “did nothing” or “just played.” A lot of things happened between the time you dropped him off that morning and when you picked him up several hours later, but he might not yet be able to give a sequential list of his activities. Here are some ideas to help your child tell you about his day.

• If your child brought home artwork or papers in his book bag, try asking him specific questions. “Please tell me about this. Are you studying planets? Does this go with another work? What class did you make this in?” Please note: Some children do not bring home very much paper work, especially in the early years. Montessori materials are designed to be concrete and hands-on to allow the child to absorb the experience but not necessarily record it on paper. The following link sheds some light on what your child might be doing if he is not bringing anything home.  MSGL blog: What did you do at preschool today?
   
• Look through the classroom photos on msgl.smugmug.com with your child. Teachers and parents take lots of photos throughout the week that provide a window into the life of the classroom. This is a great way to see what your child is doing, learn the names of his friends, and learn about some of the Montessori activities that he might be choosing.
   
• Read the whiteboards outside of the classroom at drop-off and pick-up time. Announcements about that day’s special guests, food preparation activities, and exciting new units of study will be posted there.​
   
• Check the teacher’s classroom blog at msgl.org each week. Each teacher gives an overview of the topics being explored and special projects coming up. This is also the best way to find opportunities to volunteer in the classroom where you can see first-hand what your child does at school.

Take care of yourself!
     The best thing you can do during these last few weeks of summer is to give you and your child the gift of a regular bedtime that allows enough sleep to wake up refreshed and ready for the big days ahead. Fill up with a good breakfast each morning and be extra patient with your child and especially with yourself. Parenting preschoolers, like college students, is hard work and there is no right way to do it. Follow your heart and follow your child, and in sixteen years, or so, you will be very proud of the people you have both become.

What are "Indoor" Shoes?

MSGL students get to play outside every day that the weather allows. This means their shoes can get wet and muddy. To avoid tracking that dirt onto the carpet, we ask that you provide your child with one pair of shoes to wear outside and one pair to wear inside.

Your child will probably change outdoor shoes with the seasons - from sandals to sneakers to snow boots - but indoor shoes can stay the same all year. Walking around in the classroom with bare feet is not allowed, so a comfy pair of shoes that the child enjoys wearing is a must.

  Below are some good examples of indoor shoes that work well for the children.  These styles of shoes keep a child's foot dry from spills, are non-slip, stay attached to the foot, and they allow the child to get them on and off by themselves.

Below are some examples of indoor shoes that DO NOT work well for the children. Slippers are not water-resistant and they can be difficult to walk in. If a child has not yet learned to tie, shoes with laces can be impossible for a child to get on and off by himself. Please save these types of shoes to wear at home.

Because so many children choose the same types of shoes, please be sure to write your child's name on each shoe so we know whose shoes are whose. If you want to be fancy, you can order personalized labels for shoes and clothing online.

Your thoughtfulness when shopping for indoor shoes will help put your child on the path to independence. Thank you!

     Bunny the Guinea pig came to us when her family decided to adopt an actual rabbit, sometime around 2010. She was the much-loved and snuggled River Birch class pet until her death last week while the children were on summer vacation.

     Bunny didn't really like to move around very much. She was content to sit in her well-appointed enclosure and munch on carrots and timothy hay. The children were allowed to pet her, brush her, and feed her as long as they were gentle and respectful. She sat in a box on their laps in the green chair and they could pet her with one finger or two.

Bunny never required medical care, but she did get a few check-ups.

     Bunny tolerated being brushed, especially if she had a sweet apple core to keep her occupied. She really loved spring and summer when she could get fresh lettuce from the school garden.

         Bunny was peaceful, quiet, and - did I mention - tolerant? She only nibbled a couple of fingers but we are sure she was just testing to see if they were carrots.

     Thank you for remembering Bunny with us, today. She is certainly going to be missed.

~ Heather

Seen outside Globe Willow class: "I wish this was a boring school and it was longer so I can finish my work."

     Happy birthday! Two of the four Wyandotte chicks have hatched in the Birch room. Stop by before or after class to meet them.

     What did your child do at preschool today? You can try asking, but often they will say they did nothing or they “played.” The most common question I receive from parents is, “How can I know he is doing anything at school? He never tells me anything and his cubby has been empty for days.”

     Please believe me, your child is doing something. A lot of stuff, actually. But he may not remember "doing" anything at all that day. And his accomplishments often cannot be held in the hand or seen with the eye at pick-up time. If he could tell you, it might sound like this:

I concentrated today!

When someone asked to play with me, I said yes.

I looked at the caterpillars in the jar - for a very long time. Then my teacher read me a book about butterflies. Twice. Because I asked.

I sat next to a friend who was labeling the lifecycle of the frog. I handed her the labels and helped her match them. I got her a paper towel when her fingers were gluey.

When everyone was talking about bees I told them, “Bumblebees don’t sting. Only honey bees sting. Bumblebees just bumble.” Everyone agreed with me.

I looked at a real chicken egg and a real duck egg. I said the duck egg was bigger.

I used the very heavy tortilla press to make playdough tortillas. My friends helped and we laughed. None of us pinched our fingers.

I compromised about sitting in the comfy chair.

I served myself a snack, ate it politely alongside my friends, and cleaned up after myself.

I felt sad - just for a little bit - because I missed my mom.

I noticed that the lizard’s food bowl was empty and cut some lettuce for him.

I waited for a turn on the orange bike.

I heard that a friend is going to Korea for the summer and I gave him a hug to say goodbye.

     A preschooler's greatest and most important work often doesn't have any external product to show for it. Having and being a friend, acting out of kindness, demonstrating patience and self-control, taking care of oneself, feeling satisfied with a job well done - these things are all internalized. The children in our classrooms build their character and their understanding of the world every day, but they can’t always verbalize it. They are doing so much challenging work! But they do not yet see their actions and successes as separate from themselves.

     After a sunflower seed sprouts in the garden we might notice as the stem grows taller, but we cannot see the acts of photosynthesis and respiration and transpiration that take place every single day. The sunflower plant continues to do its work converting sunlight to sugars and sugars to fuel - the internal work of living - whether we take notice or not. Then, one day it blooms and we look at it and say, “Finally!”

     Maria Montessori believed that the child reveals himself through his work, not through his outwardly visible successes and accomplishments. Every experience he has is internalized and becomes a part of his very being. She put it this way, “The things he sees are not just remembered; they form a part of his soul.”

     Stories from their day and recorded work, like the blooms of a sunflower, are parts of the child we can see and they might be pleasing to us, but they are only the product of a monumental amount of internal work. So please don’t worry when your child says she did nothing all day. Nothing to grown-ups can be everything in the life of a child.

     Lots of peace, lots of love ~ Heather

“The only language men ever speak perfectly is the one they learn in babyhood, when no one can teach them anything!" - Maria Montessori, The Absorbent Mind

The Spinosaurus
 

     Perhaps you like listening to and collecting phrases like I do. Our Montessori classrooms are great theaters for listening. Three, four, and five-year-olds are intensely thoughtful and they tell us so much about themselves just by talking with their friends. 

     This week I had the pleasure of working in the Willow, River Birch, and Canoe Birch classes and I collected as many fabulous phrases from the children as I could. The words are theirs, the spelling is mine.

On being the first to arrive... "The only time I'm not first is when Mommy brings me. Daddy is faster than Mommy."

"Frogs lay eggs, right? Butterflies lay eggs, right?"

"I had my birthday before my brother's."

"Our grandpa makes a Donald Duck sound."

While drawing dinosaurs with friends... "It's a Spinosaurus. It's the biggest carnivore on land and it's name means lizard. It reaches in the water just a little bit and snatches a fish with it's crocodile long snout."

"A drobeosaurus has toe claws and it goes 25 miles an hour."

A different dinosaur friend... "It runs 100 and 90 hours. He has a bunch of blood in his body. It's called Spinadoctora Hundreds."

"At my house I have five lipsticks. No, six."

A child was looking for a bike to ride on the playground. I asked, "I see that blue bike is available. Would you like to ride that one?"  "No! he said. "I just fell off that one."

"I'm trying to sing Let it Go, in German, but it's too hard." (The children in one class burst into singing "Let it Go" from the movie Frozen at least six times in one morning:)

"Being in the sun is so much fun."

"Will you do something interesting?"

I like to listen to teachers, as well. I overheard a few of them talking about the possibility of having a couple of chickens at school and which type might be best suited to be Montessori chickens.

"They're good egg layers, the Wyandotte's. "And they're peaceful."

"I am concerned about them getting upset and flying up into the pine tree."

"There is a 100% chance of them getting upset."

Wyandotte chick

       May all your chickens be peaceful as you enjoy some fun in the sun this holiday weekend.

     ~ Heather

Thanks to the timeless quality of Montessori materials, it seems that only the faces have changed in these photos from MSGL classrooms in 2000.

It's a genuine Polaroid photo and the genuine Mr. Jeff presenting abstract computations with the Stamp Game.

We still use the same dishwashing stands in the classroom today.

Miss Chloe has been preparing the environment at MSGL for a long time.

The Unifix Cubes are not a Montessori material but they allow for counting, sorting, color recognition, and provide a clear control of error. 

It just feels good to put the colored pencils in their matching holders.

Taking the spindles out of the boxes reinforces the counting activity used to put them in - and it builds concentration.

Two friends can work together on the Teen Boards. They are matching the quantity with the symbol and witing the numerals.

Using scissors is classified as a language activity because it builds hand-eye coordination and strengthens the hand muscles required for writing.

A comfy chair is better when it's big enough for two.

And finally, what is Steve building? 

I hope that was as fun for you as it was for me! Have a warm and wonderful Wednesday.   ~Heather

     Let's recap our Building MSGL series on Wayback Wednesday. Montessori Parents, Inc. purchased the Calvary Baptist Church on Soldiers Home Road in 1999. Demolition of the interior began in September, 2000. Now it's December, 2000 and the stud walls are in place so that wiring, plumbing, and drywall work can begin.

Looking toward the Oak Room in Building B.

Standing in Catalpa looking through the wall into the Oak Room.

Looking out the door of the Maple Room into the office hallway.

Here's the view walking in the office door.

Here's that same view just a couple of months later.

This is the Maple Room looking toward the stairs.

This is the Willow Room looking toward the kitchen area.

And here is the Spruce Room filled with drywall supplies.

The Harvey & Son Construction crew. Steve, Don, Nolan, and Tony working over Thanksgiving Break.

That's all for this week. Have a terrific Wednesday!

     It's been a long week for everyone at MSGL and it's only Wednesday. The roots of our beloved river birch tree, which shaded the sandbox for more than 10 years, finally overtook the sewage pipe coming from Building A. The tree was cut down, the sandbox was dug up, and the lovely pergola that Ron Stier designed and built to shade the children has been dismantled. This is the sight today as workers remove roots and begin to repair the pipe. As luck would have it, we received 3 inches of snow this morning so classes were cancelled.

It's not a pretty sight right now on the playground. (Photo by Tony Harvey)

Yesterday, we said goodbye to the river birch tree.

The river birch comes down, one limb at a time. (Photo by Lena Atkinson)
 

        But this is Wayback Wednesday and we have to go way back. So let's take a look back at how we got here. This is the sandbox under construction in 2001. The river birch was planted later that year. It probably seemed like a really good idea at the time.

2001 - Sandbox under construction.
 

     Two years later the children are enjoying the new sandbox. The birch tree is wrapped in black at top left.

2002

     Miss Sherry and friends enjoy the shade of the river birch and the pergola during summer camp in 2010.

2010
.

     And here is a nice photo of the whole area from Summer, 2011.

2011

     Certainly one of the most popular areas in our outdoor classroom, the sandbox is going to be sorely missed until it can be reconstructed. But even as we lament this loss, it's good to remember that things could be worse. Back in September, 2007, this was the view outside of Building A.

2007 - Old toilets being removed during demolition of Building A.

     Take heart, friends. The water will soon be flowing in Building A and children will once again play in a shady sandbox. And Spring is only eight days away. Have the best possible Wednesday!

~ Heather

     This week's installment of Building MSGL focuses on the work of the jackhammer, a tool that was put to much use during the first few months of the construction project. Lots of concrete had to be broken up and hauled away so we could remodel the buildings and install new steps and sidewalks. 

Tony Harvey breaks up concrete in Building B to make space for new plumbing for sinks and bathrooms. This was one of his least favorite days of the entire 6-month project.

Looking at Building A as the concrete demolition gets underway.

Later that day, it looked like this. Watch that first step - it's a doozy.

Don Harvey and Craig Lamb prepare to take out the upstairs landing.
 

     As the demolition continued, it became apparent that the light-duty jackhammer they had been using was not going to cut through some of the steps. One parent volunteer took a look at the slow progress they were making and set off to find a better solution. Half and hour later he pulled in with a trailer-mounted mobile air compressor and a much more powerful jackhammer. Tony Harvey said that was a real game-changer for this phase of the project.

     "We had a little jackhammer that you could plug into an outlet in an airplane bathroom," he joked. "This parent came back with a rig that looked like Iron Man built it. When we flipped the switch on the big one you could see lights flicker in the apartments across the street," he said, once again, joking. "We had been working all day on those steps and in just 20 minutes with the big hammer, they were dust."

The old steps are broken up to make way for the new stairs/ramp that will lead into the upstairs hallway in Building A.
 

     Just for fun, I am including before, during, and after photos from Building A so we can admire the progress from an old church basment entry to a modern, ADA-compliant school entrance.

Before.
 

During demolition.
 

Here it is with the concrete walls freshly poured. 
 

Here,  the railings are being installed.
 

And here it is that first summer, looking quite lovely.

Thanks for joining me in the wayback. Have a super Wednesday!

"No matter what we touch, an atom, or a cell, we cannot explain it without knowledge of the wide universe." 
- Maria Montessori, 1948, To Educate the Human Potential

The Elementary students present their space projects in these photos from 2000 - 2001.

     Stay warm out there and have a terrific Wednesday!

The Media Scape area of the Cummins Corporate Office Building in Columbus, Indiana. Photo by the Antal Building Corporation.

- Thanks to Jennifer Tyrrell for this guest post. Jennifer is a Montessori teacher who worked in the Spruce Toddler class at MSGL from 2003 - 2005.

     One of the arguments I hear most often when I'm describing Montessori is that the open workspace—in particular the freedom to move around, to work where you do best for a specific task, and the ability to make a snack when you like—is not properly preparing children for the realities of life or the workforce: at some point they will have to learn to stay at their desk and do their work like everyone else. I think my husband's workplace shows the opposite to be true. 

     My husband Jeremiah took the family to visit his "office" in Cummins’s COM building. Cummins is a well-known, large, international, Fortune 500 company that makes diesel engines, and they’ve recently built this COM building in their Columbus, Indiana, headquarters with a “collaborative workspace” design. They have converted several spaces in other buildings to this open style, as well. With this collaborative workspace, departments are located on the same floor, as much as possible. Though employees can work wherever they like on any floor, they are encouraged to work amongst their department's floor.

A work area with sitting and standing work spaces in the Cummins Corporate Office Building.  Photo by the Antal Building Corporation.

     He showed us his locker (hook and cubby) with a couple drawers for his personal items and work laptop (each employee is given one as their primary work tool), and a thin cabinet for his coat and outerwear. Then we walked around a huge floor with areas that have a variety of tables, some standing height, some for chairs; other areas with couches and coffee tables; other more intimate areas with armchairs and footstools (Jeremy's favorite). A couple of kitchenettes with long counters and stools (snack tables) are located centrally with no walls enclosing them. There are cabinets (shelves) that divide some places and contain files and materials for everyone to access. 

The kitchenette area in the Cummins Corporate Office Building. Photo by the Antal Building Corporation.

     There are even treadmills with laptop spaces and hookups for those who need movement as they work (they are calibrated for walking, not running . . . we walk in the workplace :) There are walls to divide the elevators and small conference rooms (which can be used and reserved by any employee), but other than those areas, there are no rooms, no “offices”, no cubicles, it is all shared space: managers working amongst underlings. It looks like, well . . . a grown-up Montessori classroom :)

Employees working on treadmills at the Cummins Corporate Office Building in Columbus, Indiana. AP Photo/The Republic, Joe Harpring.

     They are doing this to encourage collaborative problem solving and to make the workday more pleasant so that Cummins continues to retain younger employees. Please share with anyone who questions the appropriateness of Montessori's open workspace. :)

     You can read a news article about more of the company's redesigned workspaces see additional photos, here.

Cheers!

Jennifer

Jennifer Tyrrell is a Montessorian who has worked in public and private Montessori schools in Indiana and Wisconsin. She got her start in 2003 as an MSGL toddler assistant and is very thankful for that experience. MSGL is the strong benchmark by which all the other schools she has taught in are compared. She is currently living in southern Indiana, soaking up rural life in the woods with her two children, her husband, and soon, some chickens.

     If there truly is a flashback movie that plays in our heads just before we die, the remodeling of the MSGL buildings will certainly be a part of mine. And the sweaty people covered in dust will be in it too, smiling (mostly) like they were in these photos from the first week of demolition.

     The following pictures represent some of my favorite memories of the building project because we were all so young and optimistic. We didn't truly grasp what working for six months through the winter with no electricity and no toilets and no babysitters would be like. So many parents, teachers, spouses, and extended family members gave their days off and their nights and weekends to prepare this space to be our new and improved Montessori School of Greater Lafayette.  They did it for free and, most importantly, they did it with a sense of humor.

Dragging the folding partitions out of the basement. 

     The above photo brings to mind a particularly disheartening day. The church basement was divided up into classrooms by these heavy, orange, folding partitions. Before we could start cutting into the concrete floors and tearing out the ceilng, we had to remove all of these partitions. Did I mention that they were extremely heavy? So heavy, in fact, that we couldn't move them once we got them detached and rolled up on the floor. I recall seeing Craig Lamb, Beth Nichols, and Tony Harvey pushing on them with all of their might and they just weren't budging. The wise, manly men in our group decided to drag them out of the basement using the Bobcat. Don Harvey did just that. As Tony, project manager, recalled, "That part of the demolition was really brutal. You would go in and see what was going to beat the heck out of you that day."

     Just like in a Montessori classroom, every volunteer found a niche. Some of the parents didn't want to see anything go to waste, so they took out the light fixtures and the doors and anything that might be of value and marked it for a remodeling sale we had a few weeks later. 

Ellie's mom is organizing the salvaged items in the future toddler room.

     One of the reasons we had such a dedicated group of volunteers is that demolition work is really fun! After a long day we could put on our grubby clothes and work gloves, grab a Wonder Bar and tear into the drywall and studs.

Ron and Cathy Stier.

Brian Berndt.

Beth working in the future River Birch room.

Beth and Cathy take out nails so we could re-use the studs.

Tools like the Sawzall made the job a lot more fun. This volunteer is standing in what is now the Willow room.

Tony unloads another wheelbarrow of debris.

Water girls, Gaia and Grace.

The author was concerned about lawn maintenance.

     I was really worried that the lawn would grow too long and we would look like bad neighbors. This was the first and last time I mowed the entire campus with a push mower.

     That week was lots of fun, but I'm glad it's done. Have a great Wednesday!

Heather

Photo courtesy of Lena Atkinson

     What is Montessori?

     Rather than explaining what Montessori is, I am offering an excerpt from an article that does a beautiful job of describing what Montessorians do. Maria Montessori's Decalogue is a set of 10 rules for adults working in a Montessori classroom. It is relevant to parents, grandparents, and caregivers of all types who strive to relate to children peacefully and respectfully in any environment.

     I hope you will enjoy this expanded version of the Montessori Decalogue as written by The Mammolina Children's Home Montessori Kindergarten in Beijing, China. 

The Montessori Decalogue

1. Never touch the child unless invited by him (in some way or another).

Unless there is a very strong reason to (like avoiding an accident, for example), one should never touch a child unless a child requests it. Picking up a child without the child’s consent, even if in a playful manner, or grabbing her hand, pushing her, etc., should always be avoided. If children are engaged, looking at a book, working, playing, resting, the same principle applies. Children invite contact in many ways, and parents and adults in general, who work with children, know how to interpret the signs they send. It is important also to respect a child when she is angry and does not want to be touched or picked up.

2. Never speak ill of the child in his presence or absence.

Speaking ill of a child, or making negative comments about a child, either in the child’s presence or absence, denotes lack of respect for the child. It also sets a frame of mind and denotes an attitude that is negative and conducive to confrontation—and not always open! Preconceived ideas often linger as negative thoughts and breed reactive behavior. If an adult falls into this trap, it is very easy for a lack of patience and negative attitudes to creep in and damage the relationship with the child.

3. Concentrate on strengthening and helping the development of what is good in the child, so that its presence may leave less and less space for what is negative.

If adults focus on negative behavior, children will feel inadequate. This will result in low self-esteem, and a self-fulfilling prophecy like behavioral patterns will take over. Negativity will become second nature. Instead, by focusing on what is positive, the child will feel safe and confident. Children are learning what is and is not acceptable behavior can and cannot be done, etc. They do not need punishments or rewards. Simply to be shown what is and is not acceptable, by adults that model appropriate behavior.

4. Be proactive in preparing the environment, take meticulous and constant care of it. Help the child establish constructive relations with it. Show the proper place where the means of development are kept and demonstrate their proper use.

If the child is presented with a prepared environment, there is little need for much more. Again, modeling appropriate behavior is essential. A child that is shown an orderly environment will likewise feel encouraged to keep it orderly. If a child has available manipulatives she can handle, play and work with, rather than things she cannot touch, she will feel at ease to explore the world around her. If objects are at reach, that the child may break or hurt herself with, she should be shown how to handle them, rather than told “don’t touch!” A kitchen is a world full of wonder for a child! Cutting, cooking, stirring, pouring, etc., are all activities the child will want—and need!—to master in order to become independent. Include the child in as many activities as possible at home, from cleaning to cooking; there is enough to keep any child busy and engaged all day long.

5. Be ever ready to answer the call of the child who stands in need of you, and always listen and respond to the child who appeals to you.

There is nothing worse for a child than to feel insecure and ignored. Abandonment is a feeling no child should have to live with. “If a child asks for attention, then that child needs attention,” stressed Montessorian Margaret Homfray. When people brush a child aside and say, “she just wants attention,” that person is missing the point: a child only wants attention when she needs attention. Children who feel cared for and do not have to worry about being abandoned, even if for a short time, are far more likely to care for others and show concern for and trust others, than those who experience this sort of “cold shoulder” treatment. Also, “timeout” and “go to your room and stay there” approaches are also expressions of abandonment.

6. Respect the child who makes a mistake and can then or later correct it herself, but stop firmly and immediately any misuse of the environment and any action which endangers the child, its own development or that of others.

Avoid rushing to correct mistakes a child has committed. Children are learning to cope and function. They will persist and practice to their heart’s content whatever skill they need to acquire, until they master it. If a child starts throwing things around and disrespecting the environment, by all means, stop her. Yet, explain why you had to stop her. Reason and listen to what the child may have to say. Maria Montessori said that “a child’s first tantrums are the first ills of her soul.” There is always a reason for everything. Try to bring the reason to light. Punishing, isolating the child, etc., will only feed her pain, and burry deep those reasons—she will learn to hide rather than communicate.

7. Respect the child who takes a rest or watches others working or ponders over what she herself has done or will do. Neither call her nor force her to other forms of activity.

A child that is idle is often not idle at all… Children need to be given space to find what it is they are interested in and want to do. Once they do, they pursue their interests with unrestrained passion and perseverance! A child that is observing other children or adults is also learning. If the child is resting, she is not being lazy and doing nothing just lying there—she is most probably processing information, observing, reflecting on something she did, or saw, or is planning on doing.

8. Help those who are in search of activity and cannot find it.

Be sensitive to the needs of the child including differentiating when apparent inactivity is inner activity, or in contrast, a child is simply lost. A child in search of activity and unable to find it is usually restless. If sitting or lying down, it can be noticed that she is not “engaged;” she is not resting, but simply lost and prostrated. There is a thin line that separates these two worlds. It is the adult’s responsibility to observe carefully and find out the signs—often very different from child to child—that can reveal what the child is experiencing. Abandonment differs from rest and contemplation.

9. Be untiring in repeating presentations to the child who refused them earlier, in helping the child to acquire what is not yet her own and to overcome imperfections. Do this by animating the environment, with care, with purposive restraint and silence, with mild words and loving presence. Make your ready presence felt to the child who searches and hide from the child who has found.

A child may need to be shown the right way to do something, say a word, express her feelings or acquire any sort of new skill, many, many times. One should never grow tired of repeating it, such as reading the same bedtime story or singing the same jingle. Children seek perfection in all they do until they reach a level which meets their needs (not what the adult may think “perfect” is, or means.) To be always available but not intrusive is an art. When a child needs help, she will ask for it. When a skill has been acquired and the child no longer needs assistance, adults should respect the child’s new acquired or reached level of independence.

10. Always treat the child with the best of good manners and offer her the best you have in yourself and at your disposal.

Children who are respected will learn to respect others. Giving the child the best one has to give helps the child learn that you are someone she can count on, and teaches her to also give others the best she has to give. It is important the way Montessori puts it, “the best you have in yourself,” as if to say, always reach higher, but do not feel dismayed if you fall short, and “the best” that you can give is not the best you think or know you should give. If your best manners are not always what they should be—a common feeling parents harbor when children seem to be pushing their patience beyond the limits, do not lose heart. The way Dr. Montessori put it, is basically this: have realistic expectations towards the child, and yourself too. Give the best you have to give, but don’t feel guilty if you fall short. Simply keep striving to improve and always do your best. If you commit a mistake, giving the child your best may well be recognizing it and apologizing. “Amy, Mommy got upset and shouted. That was not nice of me. I am sorry.” Children also need to recognize mistakes, learn to apologize, and that parents are not always perfect.

These are basic principles. What Montessori strives for is to protect the child from all sorts of negative influences that can create deviations in the child’s spirit and psyche. To preserve the natural curiosity of the child, help her find her interests, protect her passion for learning, foster it and let it grow in a healthy way. In this way, the child can contribute her best to society. This is conducive to world peace, as Dr. Montessori envisioned it, and Montessorians believe is possible. It takes passion, it takes commitment, and it takes working together.

- Excerpted from Montessori: Committed People with a Passion for Children by the Mammolina Children's Home Montessori Kindergarten in Beijing, China.

The weather forecast calls for all of this snow to be melting in about a week. In case you think you just can't wait that long, here are some photos of MSGL summers past to see you through. 

1994 - Digging in the tiny sandbox at Morton Center.

2000 - Hula hooping at Morton Center.

2001 - Hi Cathy!

2002 - The Parent/Infant class posing by the sandbox.

2003 - Waiting for a wagon ride.

2009 - Sack racing at the family picnic at Happy Hollow Park.

2010 - Releasing a newly-emerged Monarch butterfly.

2011 - Summer camp besties.

2012 - Shoveling in the shady sandbox.

2013 - Gardening at summer camp.

It will only be a few more days until warmer, friendlier weather arrives. Until then, take heart! Spring never fails to arrive.

Have a terrific Wednesday.

     1996 - Atlanta hosted the Summer Olympics this year and Prince Charles and Princess Diana were divorced. Dolly the sheep became the first mammal to be cloned. The first version of the Java programming language was released, HotMail started providing free email service, and just over 10 million people were using the internet. 

     Do you know someone who attended MSGL in 1996? You just might find them here.

Parent/Infant Class

Toddler Class

Preprimary Class A

Preprimary Class B

Preprimary Class D

Preprimary Class E

Extended Day Kindergarten

Thanks for reading. I hope you have been able to go sledding in all this snow. Have a terrific Wednesday!

     One full year before MSGL acquired the property that is now our campus, the Calvary Baptist Church invited us to hold an open house for our families. These photos, from September 24, 1999, show lots of familiar faces and a campus without ramps, fences, or the 10 inches of snow that is on the ground today. 

Suman Harshvardhan and Joy Kane.

Mary McKay and Karen Hoagberg.

The predecessor of the toddler playground.

The future campus as it looked in September, 1999.

     I can't bear to throw away a good opportunity for a photo comparison, but we don't have a current photo taken from the same perspective. Here are two beautiful photos that offer an idea of what this view looks like today.  

Thank you to Dave Wegiel for this photo from November, 2013.

Thank you to Lena Atkinson for this photo from August, 2013.

      I hope you were able to enjoy seeing some green grass and leaves on the trees. And I promise that Spring will come exactly when it's supposed to. Until then, thanks for reading and have your best possible Wednesday! 

     On September 21, 2000, Montessori Parents, Inc. officially closed on the purchase of the property at 2552 Soldiers Home Road that would become the new campus of the Montessori School of Greater Lafayette. To celebrate and prepare for the next step, the board of directors and some staff and parents met that evening in the sanctuary of what was the former Calvary Baptist Church. Board president Craig Lamb offered a toast with champagne served in paper cups. 

Board members, staff, and parents celebrate the beginning of the construction of the new MSGL campus.

     The next morning, demolition of the buildings began. MSGL parent Tony Harvey coordinated the building project. His father, Donald Harvey, was the general contractor.

Don and Tony Harvey

     These are photos of the front of the sanctuary that is now the northwest corner of the Catalpa Room. When asked about these photos, Tony said that the gold walls on the left were part of the room that lead to the baptistry. "If you came to Calvary Baptist Church and you wanted to be saved," he explained, "you had to go through that room."

Tearing out the walls of the former sanctuary to create the Catalpa Room.

Just for perspective, this is the same wall four months later with new heat/ac, drywall, and paint.

     This was just the beginning of 5 months of hard and dirty work by many dedicated staff and parent volunteers. Three generations of families came together for one common goal. True friendships were forged. A lot of those people are still involved with MSGL today. I look forward to sharing the few photos and many stories of that time here on Wayback Wednesdays. If you were part of this amazing project and wish to share your stories, please add them as comments to the bottom of these posts or emaill me and I will be so happy to include them in an upcoming post. Of course, any photos you share will be greatly appreciated.

    Thanks for reading! Have a terrific Wednesday.